CD's

You know what the best part of being paid for is? You totally don't have to try to impress them. They've already chosen you. All you have to do is stay charming, keep the true feelings hidden far within yourself. I was on a 'date' with someone who was pretty overweight, but had a kind smile. The whole night he kept saying "Why would a young lad like you be interested in an old timer like me?" and I kept saying vague things like "You seem nice enough" and "Because I thought you seemed cool".

Equally boring, but they seemed to satisfy him. I didn't have the heart to say "Because you chose me, and I know you're going to pay me". While my line of work might seem a bit inglorious, I know I still have a good heart. And if I can give him an awesome night, maybe he'll be good to me too.

I ended up having a wonderful night. We stopped by a nice restaurant and shared a slice of cake and a few glasses of wine. We were one of the few people in the little café, and we started talking to the waitress who was absolutely charming. We left and walked down the street, and stopped at a music store. While we were browsing I found a music CD I had been meaning to buy. To my surprise he said he was going to buy it. Since we were on a 'date' he said I shouldn't pay for anything. It's hard not to feel a bit guilty about it. But at the same time I knew it made him happy to see me happy. I told him that would be cool, and we ended up walking out with that CD.

I didn't end up going to his place. Instead he dropped me off at my car, telling me he had a wonderful night with a charming young man. We kissed once and I got out. I listened to the CD all the way home, a lingering sensation that maybe there were still good people in the world.

First

I can still remember the first time. Meeting up with him, feeling so scared. Getting into his car and driving away. I wondered if I'd ever see the light again, or if I was just being paranoid.

Once inside his car he put a hand on my knee and told me how glad he was to see me. That he had so much he wanted to….discuss

Prior instructions, he had told me the moment I got inside I needed to strip for him. I'm still shy with my body, but for the moment, he was paying for my time…and other things

He showed me to his bedroom then left to go grab some drinks. I carefully stripped, making note of the window, and a second door out. Once I was naked I sat at the edge of his bed. A few moments later I could hear him coming down the hall. He walked in and saw me sitting there and smiled. In boths hands he held a pink drink. Said it was vodka and something else. I took it and faked a sip. I didn't want to drink something if I didn't know where it came from. And even if it was just vodka, I certainly didn't want to get drunk.
I felt another shiver up my spin as he put a hand on my shoulder

He was heavy, his skin loose and he laid on top of me thrusting. Small breaths of air escaped me. After a few minutes he finally rolled away panting. He lit a cigarette  pointed to a bathroom and told me I could get cleaned up there. I walked away with my clothes, washing quickly. I looked into the mirror. Looking into my eyes. I thought I would feel different. Selling yourself is such a taboo. But I felt just fine. Nothing had changed, I was still me.