Sheets

I fell and floated into the sheets that fluffed out in every direction. My hazy mind making me believe for half a second I was still in a sea of clouds.

I was in my friends flat. He had picked me up to 'hangout' with him. When we reached his house he lit up some mary and passed it to me. I'm not a big fan of altered states of mind. I love them, but I have such an addictive personality I'm afraid I might abuse it. If my thoughts towards sex were any indication, I often couldn't help myself.

It funny the ideas your mind plays when your altered. I always feel like I am flying, and simultaneous moving between time like frames in a movie. Shifting dimension with every breath. I remember the first time I smoked with him. We laid staring at the ceiling, and I started laughing because the ceiling tile to the roof looked like a framed picture of the roof. Then I had the idea, what if you painted that panel like a famous artwork, like the Mona Lisa, or Starry night, and then put it back on the ceiling so it looked like you had a framed picture there. I couldn't stop laughing, I found it so funny.

Another I was sitting at the bottom of a shower. He was standing over me, and I had been doing some things with my mouth. He stepped out of the stream, and the water cascaded over me. I closed my eyes and immediately I was on the ocean floor, a cold tide moving around me as I stood at the edge of a coral reef. Slightly dark blue water submerging me as I stared over the coral, soggy clothes fluttering around me. I remember seeing this and keeping my eyes closed. Such a beautiful scene, I didn't want to lose it.

As the sea of cloud sheets settled down I rolled over onto my back so I was staring back at the ceiling. I could hear him in the bathroom water running from the tap as he did god knows what. I sank further into the downy sheets. I knew he kept them on his bed special for me. I'm always cold and want them. After a while he came back in. My eyes closed I imagined I could see the fun above a sea of clouds. A hand settled on my chest, and my legs were thrown around shoulders. I could feel the slippery of high-quality lube being pushed into me. I gave a gentle moan. This would be the 3rd time that evening we had done it.

First time on the couch where he wanted to use a (huge!) toy. I told him I was feeling vanilla, but that didn't stop him from still eventually holding me down and using it anyways.

Sometimes I wonder what I am doing with him anyways. He is a bit older, but not super old. Still, doing the math, when I was born he was 13. and when he was legal I was 5. I once told him this math and he was disgusted with me for even bringing it up. A fine response to such a tricky comment. Still. At times when he makes me feel powerless I always wonder what a 5 year old could do against an 18 year old anyways....

The second time was also on the couch, though much faster than the first. So later when I moved to his room, I figured we were done.

I cried out with the first impact. After twice earlier you really are sore down there, and I really didn't want to do it again. He ignored my cries and pushed forward anyways

We have developed a sort of dance, where when I start feeling too sore I tell him I can't take it anymore. Usually he speeds up faster until he comes. When I can't take it more than that I arc my back and try to move away. This is usually when he really holds me down. I have tried to get away before and he has held me pretty firm. The more I struggle the faster he comes. He gets off on dominating as much as I get off on being dominated. As I once read on a patch, the faster you scream the louder we come (talking about EMTs)